Friday, October 19, 2007

When Eating = Cheating

So, if winning = losing, then I would say I feel that eating = cheating.

But I know that if I DON'T eat, my body will not lose weight properly. To lose weight properly, I'd have to eat just a little. Because I'm nursing my baby girl, I know I need to eat enough to keep my milk production up.

So why do I feel guilty when I put food in my mouth? I'll need to figure this out.

Does it stem from that perfectionism vein? Yeah, probably. Does it tie into having to look good in front of others, and the fear of being judged? For sure. Is there more to it than that? Likely.

Today has been a good day, but my tuna salad sandwich made me feel like a pig - even though I accurately counted every bite! Then I had to have a snack, and even though it was all accounted for, I somehow felt like I was eating something I shouldn't. I need to get over this feeling, because I know that my emotions play a big part in juts how hard my body hangs onto the fat.

Tonight I have to run off to a wedding rehearsal for a friend (I'm singing), so I might not get supper until later. And my little brother (playing piano at the wedding and thus attending the rehearsal with me) asked me to take him out for a burger afterwards. Do I have the self-control?

I guess we'll see.

No comments:

My weight loss journey